A lot has changed



This was supposed to be a happy and safe place but everything seems foreign. Everybody has been distant, and it is possible to miss your family when you live under the same roof. Everyone is busy chasing their dreams and there is no one to reach out to anyone who is going through a rough patch in their lives.



There was a time you looked forward to going home because there was someone to listen to your long tales or allow you to vent after having a long day. Sadly all you have are great memories because the home has become an empty nest and you hold onto the memories you shared with some of your family members that you have lost.

I don’t know what home means to you but I hope it is full of love, support and joy.

Brand Loyalty

Have you ever wondered why your parents only buy a particular brand of peanut butter? Maybe it is time you sit them down and ask them why they have been loyal to several brands. These brands have been part of your household and they have been a part of your life.

As I look back I have realised that I have been loyal to particular brands firstly because that’s what my mother preferred to buy and they somehow rubbed onto me.



Fast forward to my adult years, there is a particular shoe brand that dominants my shoe closet. This brand has been a part of my life since I could walk. The colourful canvas shoes were comfortable when I was in kindergarten. When I went to first grade I wore the shoe with confidence. I wore this shoe brand on my first date, job interview and when I had a run around town.  This particular brand has had my back for as long as I remember and we will stick together until the end.

I have been loyal to a particular sanitary ware brand because it gave me confidence in my first period. Although I was anxious, this brand became my friend and its brand name always makes me smile and remember that my period is a happy time🙃

The blast furnace

“Each age comes with its pressures“, The words that my aunt said while rekindling the fire a decade ago makes a lot of sense now. I was wrong for judging her, she has walked the paths before, she has been thrown in the deep end and I have lost count of how many times adulthood has been unkind to her.

I prefer being in my apartment, sitting on my couch and watching the members of staff from the supermarket close to my house receive their deliveries. Life goes on whether I sit on the couch and wear my misery cap or wear my beautiful smile.

Sometimes when you have tried so hard or rather done your best you wonder where you went wrong. But it has dawned to me on countless occasions that life has no formula.
I want to be like them, I want to walk down the aisle too, I want to look forward to leaving my workplace and going to a home full of love, I want to raise a tiny human being that looks like me. Is it possible to ask my peers how they have managed to balance a lot of responsibilities without them making fun of them? When will I be able to know that this is the right time?

You deserve to know

You deserve to know
I write this letter with a heavy heart. I wish I could locate where the pain is coming from and ease the pain. It hurts and I wish it would all go away. It is difficult to explain to someone that you feel like you are about to drown when you are walking on dry land. Sometimes I struggle to catch my breath but then maybe it is all happening in my head but although it might sound silly it feels real to me.



You deserve to know why I have been distant lately, but do you have the time to sit down and listen. I don’t want to burden you with my tonne of struggles, and I don’t want to be a burden. One moment I have everything figured out but then it just hits me and I want to spend the day in bed. Is this all my own doing or should I blame the pandemic? Maybe it is time I find someone to talk to.

Fingers crossed, it will get better.

Me


This blog post is dedicated to anyone who is going through a difficult time, who might be feeling anxious, confused and exhausted. You are not alone

The journey by bus

The dusty roads and the overcrowded bus terminus brought back a nostalgic feeling of home. Going home to the rural areas means spending time with loved ones and being in a different space where you are surrounded by nature and cattle bells and goats bleating rather than the unending car hoots.

This bus might remind you of the good or the bad memories.

Some go home to be with their parents or grandparents is also time to celebrate their wins and ask for advice on certain issues.

The carrier of the bus might be packed with groceries and gifts from loved ones in the city. Although some families are unable to travel to the rural areas they make sure that they have sent the bus driver with a parcel to be delivered to their homestead. The enclosed letter warms parents hearts since they are notified that their children and their families are well.

This bus also reminds some people of what they have lost and they only hold onto the memories since death robbed some parents of the opportunity of watching their children disembark from a bus.

Lastly, for some families, this bus reminds them that they can reconcile with their loved ones. Fix the wrongs and loved ones

Although the journey to the rural areas can be uncomfortable, it will never dampen someone’s spirit because they will focus on the bigger goal which is meeting their loved ones.
What does the bus or the overcrowded bus terminus remind you of?

This too shall pass

May you heal and have the strength to go through the day. May your tears ease the pain and may the good memories comfort you. You cannot change everything but you ought to find peace over the things you cannot change.

Remember, you are stronger than you think. I hope the past experiences will give you the strength to fight. If you do not have the strength to fight,  please remember the day you held your child in your arms, when chose to be happy or when you laughed so hard? How did those happy experiences make you feel? Do not let that fighter and the happy soul in you down. Keep fighting, soldier on and remember, this too shall pass

Don’t let go

This life stole our joys, we wish we could call or embrace our loved ones but it only hits us that they will continue to live in our hearts. Sometimes we receive bad news every day and we are uncertain of what will happen tomorrow. Our hearts have been broken and our spirits have been crashed and one would wonder if the pain will ever go away. Maybe you have received a lot of bad news as compared to bad news

But…
I think it’s brave of you to smile and laugh each day. You are brave for keeping hope alive because it keeps going. I think it’s brave of you to hold onto the memories of your loved ones whom you have lost and make them proud. You are brave for trying and never giving up. You are brave for being here!

Take a walk in the library

Hello my lovely, how is 2022 treating you? Here are some of the quotes from the books that I read but failed to review on The Baobab. The stories were raw and I could see parts of myself in these stories. Now that I am forgiven😅 do read the quotes and look for these seven books. PS I recommend these books below😀



“The losses just kept piling up. It was hard for me to see her there, hear her ragged breath, and think of how she had persevered, but she had. Just lying there in my bed was a testament to her perseverance, to the fact that she survived, even when she wasn’t sure she wanted to. I used to believe that God never gives us more than we can handle, but then my brother died and my mother and I were left with so much more; it crushed us.”-Gifty from the Transcedent Kingdom


Until you attempt to write the story of your life, you cannot quite understand just how hard it is to grasp at the beginning.” -Memory from The Book of Memory written by Petina Gappah

“The war took Zik,” I said in Igbo. Speaking of death in English has always had, for me, a disquieting finality.” -Things around my neck written by Chimamanda Ngozie Adichie



“Friendship has splendours that love knows not. It grows stronger when crossed, whereas obstacles kill love. Friendship resists time, which wearies and severs couples. It has heights unknown to love.”– So long a letter written by Mariama Ba

“Happiness is not dependent on whether or not we have problems, any more than it is dependent on whether or not we have material wealth.” The Be Happy Attitude Robert Schuller

“Jealousy is the worst feeling in the world. It creeps up on you, hugs you so that you can’t breathe. Your chest feels compressed and food loses its taste. In my case my condition was worsened by uncertainty.”-Vimbai from Hairdresser of Harare written by Tendai Huchi

Part of grief’s tyranny is that it robs you of remembering the things that matter.”-Notes on Grief written by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

The big city

During my university years, I stayed in Harare the capital city of Zimbabwe and is it a busy city. It took time for me to get used to the big city because I was coming from a small town and although I usually visited my family in the city I was so used to waiting for them to come and pick me up after disembarking from the bus. But now no one could babysit me and I had to face the city on my own. Here are so the pointers that made my stay in the city exciting and they continue to apply now that I am used to city life.

I was coming from a town that had one traffic light, one branch for each supermarket and a particular bank. You can read more of it from My series

*Always have some extra money in your pockets just in case someone steals your wallet. That way you will be able to go back home.

* If you get lost ask for directions from a security guard in a banking hall.

*Mark a road using permanent buildings, (Jason Moyo- Joina City) there was a time I marked my road using a local boutique and guess what the next time I passed that building it was now a bookshop

*Be cautious and you never know, the person standing next to you can be a thief.

* If you happen to get lost, do not panic but walk with your head held high and walk to a familiar place and ask for directions.

*Your phone must be close to you, my phone was always in bra🤣🤣. You can’t lose your phone and money at once.

I would love to know some of the pointers that have been helpful when you are in a busy place or capital city.

A new chapter

New Year makes a new beginning, a new dawn and it is a new chapter of your life. This is a chance to start all over again, to forget about your past mistakes and never look back.

You have to forgive yourself and learn to be kind to yourself. May you follow your dreams and find a million reasons to smile. Remind yourself of the time you fell and how you managed to get back up. Never doubt yourself because you are brave, you are special and you deserve the best always.

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